Passing
by RosalindB
Summary: Set after Chet fails his engineer exam in "The Jenkins Girl". CJ receives an invitation from her mother's estranged family. Discussion of serious topic.
1. Chapter 1

**Passing**

**By RosalindB June 2011**

**No copyright infringement is intended. Emergency! Is owned by Universal/Mark VII. I don't own these characters, just taking them out to play. This story's original characters belong to the author. No profit from this work, only personal enjoyment.**

Don't let the title fool you, no death in this story. Set after Chet failed his engineer's test in "The Jenkins Girl".

Buzzzzzz...

Cynthia Jenkins, soon to be Cynthia Jenkins-Kelly, rolled over and turned off the alarm. It was 5:30 am. Enough time to make love to her fiance before sending him off to work. They found it more enjoyable early in the morning. The stress and hustle of the day hadn't set in, and it put them both in better moods to handle it. She rolled over to face her still sleeping Chet. He'd spent the day before hanging out with Marco and his family. Marco's mother invited her, but CJ had a wedding to photograph. Besides, she didn't want Chet to stop hanging out with his friends. She learned a long time ago that friends were precious and it took work to keep them. Chet had too much fun apparently and fell asleep as his head hit the pillow. She considered skipping their ritual.

Then she noticed it.

Chet's mustache twitched.

She leaned in more and breathed on his ear.

It twitched again.

She nibbled his neck, realizing he was awake and messing with her.

"CB," she whispered."You can go back to sleep if you want. We can always skip-"

Chet rolled onto his side and kissed her. He ran his tongue around her mouth, slowly at first, then more passionately.

"No way," he panted after the kiss. "I'm gone for two days. I'm not missing my session."

999999

"Mornin' Chet!" Roy greeted his co-worker as he changed.

"Hey Roy. How was the family trip?"

"Not bad, not bad at all. Beach was great. How was Marco's party?" Roy slipped into his uniform shirt.

Chet sat down on the bench to put on his boots.

"What a bunch they are! Food like I don't know what, everybody's talking at the same time, kids had a blast with the kites I brought. It was a good time."

Roy nodded. "So how's CJ?"

Mike walked in and began to change. "That was my question. How's CJ?"

"Now why does everyone assume I was with CJ? We each have our own friends you know." Chet turned toward his locker to hide his blush.

"Well," Mike replied "You're early. CJ's place is closer to the station. Also, you didn't set up any water bombs, which you usually do when you're early. Also," he sniffed the air near Chet, "there's Ocean Breeze in the air. That's a girl's shampoo."

"And you know that because?" Chet confronted Mike with a grin.

"My sister uses it," came the reply.

"Joanne likes it too," Roy chimed in.

Marco hustled into the locker room, pulling off his shirt as he dashed to his locker.

"Morning fellas," he panted. "Hate being late, overslept."

"Gee I wonder why," Chet teased.

Marco looked over at Chet. "How's CJ? Mama wants to meet her."

"Why do you think I was with CJ?" Chet huffed.

"You got here before me. No water bomb. And," he sniffed the air, "that's Ocean Breeze shampoo."

"Ugh!" Chet threw up his hands. "Gotta change my routine." He started to leave when Johnny skidded in.

"Morning 'sCJ?"  
>Johnny talked, stripped and switched clothes at the same time. The other guys shook their heads.<p>

"You too Gage?" Chet asked "Why do you think I was at her place?"

Johnny paused long enough to say, "Ocean Breeze." then kept dressing.

_Gotta take **my** shampoo over there this week, _Chet made a mental note.

He walked into the kitchen and set up the coffee. Captain Stanley sat at the table, reviewing the log. Henry, the slightly thinner mascot sprawled on the couch, until Chet walked in.

"Mornin' Cap."

"Hey there Chet." Stanley saw Henry leave the couch, but didn't say anything. Chet set the pot on the stove. He felt something at his feet. Henry looked up at him, wagging his tail.

"What's with you dog?"

Henry sniffed Chet, then ambled out of the kitchen, sniffing the floor.

"Maybe he needs to go out," Chet said to Cap. " I better open the back bay."

Chet raised the back bay door. By now the others were headed to get coffee, but stopped when Henry walked to Chet's van and sat down, staring. Then the dog made his way to the side of the van, sniffed, and sat again.

"What's with Henry?" Johnny asked.

"Beats me. He sniffed the floor all the way out here. I thought he needed to go," Chet answered.

Cap joined them and said, "He sniffed you first Kelly."

Henry barked at the van. Cap knew exactly why the dog was watching the van, but waited to see if anyone else picked up on it.

Johnny figured it out.

"Hahaha! Henry's looking for a tummy rub from CJ! Hee hee hee. You've got her scent Chet! Hahaha! Ocean Breeze!" Johnny laughed all the way to the kitchen.

The beleaguered fireman turned to the others and said, "Think it's time for the Phantom to make a cameo appearance."


	2. Chapter 2

Passing

**Chapt 2 - Mail & Mutts**

**By RosalindB June 2011**

**Last time: Chet got caught out by everyone at the station-including the dog.**

The morning full of meetings, project reviews, and gallery scheduling passed quickly. CJ was ready for a break to run errands before meeting with Steve Stunning, her modeling agent. He shortened his name from "Stunninbergetz" upon arriving in Los Angeles. The name change was one of the smartest moves he ever made. His next smartest was promoting CJ for the LaFrance Shoes job. The photographer loved her calm demeanor, and her command of the French language. A one time shoot turned into a full blown campaign. CJ stopped at the post office before the meeting. She kept a post office box for the occasional strange fan letter.

"Hey Miss CJ," Harry the box clerk greeted her, surrounded by dusty boxes and unsorted letters.

"Hi Harry! How are the grandchildren?"

"Funny you should ask, I got new pictures!" Harry pulled out his already stuffed wallet, and flipped to the latest pictures of crawling babies.

"Aww they're so cute," she cooed over each one. Harry finally put away his wallet and handed CJ a letter.

"It was addressed to your box, but it's Certified, so you have to sign for it," he said.

"Hmm, North Carolina. I don't know anyone there," she mused.

"Must be a weird fan then," Harry suggested. CJ turned the envelope over looking for a name.

"A fan wouldn't go through the trouble of Certified Mail," she answered, then stuffed the envelope in her purse with the others from her box.

"Oh well, I'll find out later. Good to see you Harry," she waved and headed out.

"If it is something weird, come right back here and file a report. We take that stuff seriously," Harry called out.

Steve Stunning's office was lined with 8 X 10 glossies of his clients. Some of them hit "the big time" or just about to. Some were past clients who moved on or left the business. Steve was no fool. Some people weren't cut out for the waitressing jobs, sleepless nights, or constant rejection. Cynthia Jenkins was not one of those people. He knew she had to survive on her own, so she did anything-as long as it was legal. Her LaFrance ad hung at the front of the reception area. Her Sparkle Lite Drink promo was next to it. He jumped at the knock on the door.

"Come in sunshine!" He opened the door and gave his star client a hug.

"Hey Steve, what's shakin'" CJ looked at the Sparkle Lite ad and shook her head.

"Still hate that one kiddo?" Stunning laughed.

"Yes, I look like a nerd," she answered. "So any photo assignments-as in I'm behind the camera?"

He guided her to a seat in the waiting area. "Not this time, but I've got a guy from Kendall's Hardware in the office. They want to do a power tool promo, but have a female model handle them. It'll appeal to your tomboy side," he winked. CJ rolled her eyes, but laughed.

"We've worked together too long," she replied.

"Hang tight here for a second, let me finish with him, then I'll introduce you." Stunning returned to his private office.

"Willie, my star model is here. She's hot, funny, and not afraid of power tools. You need someone like that, confident. It'll sell the tools-trust me."

The store executive asked, "Who is she? Some blonde? We don't need bikini girls Steve."

Steve shook his head, "No way. She's a brunette, curvy, but has a great tomboy side. She's a photographer too, so she knows how to work a shoot-won't waste your time. Her name's Jenkins, Cynthia Jenkins-LaFrance Shoe girl."

The executive's eyes widened.

"Her? She's the exotic lookin' one right? What is she anyway? Indian?"

Stunning hesitated. That question meant either they were curious, or they didn't want a mixed heritage person. Some clients want the "All American" look.

"Nope. Dad was white, Mom was black. Born and raised here."

"Oh, she's a mutt then. Well, lemme meet her." Willie put a cigar in his mouth. Steve immediately regretted recommending CJ. He could tell this guy was trouble, but CJ was already there so he went to get her.

CJ's face betrayed her anger.

"I heard him," she said. "I won't do anything stupid, but you better triple my fee."

"Don't worry babe, I'll make sure he pays. Maybe he'll say no and save us both the headache."

They walked in together. CJ offered her sized him up in an instant. Slightly overweight, thinning hair, nasty smelling cigar, bad suit, tie with stain, and ogling stare.

"Hello Mr.-"

"Thomas. Willie Thomas. And you're-"

"The mutt," came the terse reply. Willie dropped his cigar.

"Uh well, nice to meet you Miss Jenkins," Willie suddenly became professional. CJ already decided not to work with Willie Thomas.

999999

"Los Angeles County Fire Department, Marco Lopez speaking."

"Hola Marco. It's CJ."

"Hey! How are you chica? Sorry you missed the party. Momma asked for you."

CJ laughed, "Yes Chet told me. And from how fast he fell asleep, it seemed I missed a really good time."

Marco began to laugh along. "We gave him heck this morning. He must've used your shampoo. Even Henry thought you were in the van."

CJ cracked up more.

"Oh my gosh! Poor Chet. I'm going to get some of his stuff and keep it here. Speaking of, is he busy?"

"Nope, I'll get him, hold on." Marco put CJ on hold and called out to his friend.

"Chet! CJ's on line 2. I told her you needed shampoo."

While the others laughed again, Chet picked up the phone in the dorm.

"Hi Thia,"he sighed.

"Oh no, is it that bad?" she tried not to laugh.

"It was a little rough this morning, but I got Gage good before lunch," Chet replied. "By the way, could you get some of my shampoo and-"

"Keep it here? Yes, it's on the list. Marco told me the short version."

"Um, what's up? You okay?" he almost forgot CJ called himand not the other way 'round.

"Yes, got called a mutt by a potential client-who I refused by the way, and received some mail."

Chet seethed. "I hate that term. Did you smack him?"

"No CB, I have to pick my battles."

"Hmpf. And the mail?"

"My mother's sister wrote me a letter. She wants me to come and visit. After no contact for 12 years. I'll show it to you when I see you. Weird day. You?"

"No crazy calls yet. I love you."

"Love you too. See you. Be safe."

Chet hung up, but the angry look stayed on his face. Johnny noticed it as he changed into a dry shirt from the water bomb.

"What's up?"

"I'm so glad I wised up and stopped buggin' you about your heritage. Some ass called Thia a 'mutt' today."

Johnny looked at his friend, waiting for the rest of the story.

"Potential client. Referred to her as a 'mutt'. She declined the job. That's not the first time Johnny. People walk up to her and ask if she's the "shoe girl", then ask what is she. Sometimes people are cool, but some people are just ignorant."

John just nodded. He knew all too well how ignorant people can be.


	3. Chapter 3

Passing

**Chapt 3 - Out of the Woodwork**

**By RosalindB June 2011**

**Last time: CJ rebuffed an insulting potential client.**

CJ finally had a few moments to sift through her mail.

Light bill.

Bank statement.

Investment statement

Fan letter from someone who bought a print.

Then two more envelopes.

A pink envelope, with some very bad handwriting she recognized. She opened that one first.

Inside, an ornate greeting card with a sketch of a red rose on the outside.

The words inside:

_You're cooler than a glass of lemonade on a hot day._

_You comfort me like peanut butter & jelly._

_I wish I could say it better._

_I love you._

_CB_

She sighed, laughed and put the card on the refrigerator.

CJ returned to the table and opened the mystery envelope from North Carolina.

_Dear Cynthia,_

_We haven't seen each other since you were very small. My name is Rasheda Thompson. I'm your mother's youngest sister. I'm sure you don't remember me, and that's okay. My mother, your grandmother, never approved of your mama marrying your daddy. Frankly, she felt your dad was just another white guy looking for something exotic. A lot of white guys here do that._

_Anyway, I'm sure you know that your grandma and my other sister didn't speak to your momma for several years. I don't know how your momma explained it, and I won't try to dipute her since she's passed on. _

_Cynthia, I wouldn't be surprised if you tore up this letter and threw it away. We haven't seen you since your momma's funeral, and didn't offer to take you when your daddy died. We couldn't do anything about that since his sister was left in charge. But honestly, you'd have a hard time fitting in down here anyhow. _

_I hope your life wasn't too difficult. A friend of ours was in California a while back, and saw the story in the paper about your speech. They brought us a copy. You look so pretty, and you're all educated and doing your thing. I have the article pasted on the mirror in my hair salon._

_Your grandma left this earth last year. Before she went home to the Lord, she said she wished things were different. That we had no business being so hardheaded. So it's up to me and your Aunt Ramona to try to make things right. We'd like you to come and visit. Show you your momma's side of the family. You may have figured out that you're a lot like her, real independent and all. But we'd really love to meet you, or at least letters back and forth._

_And just so you don't worry-we don't need money. I run my own salon, and Ramona is a nurse, and your two uncles have their own businesses, so our mouths are fed. You just write back when your're ready-or you can call me. 560-555-1212 I put a picture of us so you have an idea of what we look like. We're working on our figures. (smile)_

_Aunt Rasheda_

CJ studied the photo. Two slightly overweight women stood behind four smiling children, dressed in Sunday clothes. To each side men in suits. The back of the photo said "Percy Thompson, Rasheda Thompson, Ramona Thompson-Wilson, Patrick Thompson & assorted children" CJ laughed at the "assorted children" who were most likely her cousins courtesy of Ramona and her husband. She was re-reading the letter when the phone rang.

"Jenkins Photography"

"Hello doll,"came the somber reply.

"CB, what's wrong?" she put the letter down.

"Um, rough call. MVA with a fatality, young girl." CJ's heart fell. She knew Chet sometimes took these calls personally, especially when it involved children.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart. Do you want to talk?"

"I can't. Roy's waiting to call Joanne. I just wanted to hear your voice."

"Well, if you want, call me later. I'm not going anywhere today. I love your card. Thank you."

"You got it? Great. I love you."

"Be safe. I love you too."

She decided to wait until she saw Chet in person to talk about the letter.


	4. Chapter 4

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 4 - Picking Battles

Cynthia Jenkins was a photographer on the rise. She was a model on the move. She was loved by a great guy.

Cynthia Jenkins was not a good cook. Sometimes she burned water. However, Cynthia was a good learner and determined to fix an edible meal other than pancakes and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. She knew Chet had at least one bad run, so a good normal meal was in order. He wasn't due back for another day, so there was time to practice. Just as CJ put the noodles in the pot, the phone rang.

"Jenkins Photography"

"Hey Thia."

"Hi there," CJ wanted to send a hug through the phone line. "What's up? How are you?"

"Eh, so so. Had another kid hurt. Barbecue gone bad. Kid was too close to the grill, shirt caught fire. Grill got knocked over so fire on the lawn and the the kid."

CJ sighed. "How's the child doing?"

"Fortunately first and second degree, mostly on the arm. Mother had the hose out, so she was able to douse it before we got there. When I get back tomorrow first thing is a hug."

CJ made a kissing noise over the phone.

"Well a hug, more if you want, and a nice bowl of minestrone soup,"she offered.

"Mrs. Roselli's back?" he asked.

"No! I'm making it," CJ huffed.

There was a long pause, while Chet considered his next sentences.

"Thia. I love you. Love your artistic skills. Love how you love me. But baby, you cook like Gage."

CJ gasped then laughed, "That's low Kelly!"

Johnny, hearing Chet's end of the conversation yelled in the background, "What's that mean?"

"Um, I gotta go. Pigeon's cooking," Chet laughed back.

"Go on then, I'm practicing the recipe and you will eat your words. Love you."

"Love you too."

CJ hung up then sniffed the air. Then it hit her.

The noodles! She ran to the stove to see them sticking to the pot.

Chet dragged himself to the studio. As much as he missed his own place sometimes, he was glad CJ's was near the station, especially after a rough shift. Cynthia watched him walk up to the porch. She opened the screen door and welcomed him with a hug and very passionate kiss. Chet took a moment to enjoy his girlfriend's embrace. He sighed.

CJ pulled away and looked into his face.

"You're tired. Go clean up. I'll fix the soup." She guided him in.

Chet was grateful for the hot shower (with his own shampoo), but didn't look forward to the soup. He was too tired to worry much about the cooking experiment. After his shower, he silently went to the bedroom and lay down.

CJ didn't realize Chet was asleep. She was concentrating on creating a burn-free soup. She gave it one final taste.

_Ahh almost as good as Mrs. Roselli's._

She turned off the stove and realized Chet didn't come out to the kitchen. She crept to the bedroom to check. Her mustache therapist was stretched out on the bed, gently snoring. With a soft chuckle CJ picked up the comforter and spread it over hour later, Chet entered the living room, yawning. He walked up to CJ and wrapped his arms around her.

"Hungry?" she asked over her shoulder.

"Yeah, I guess I'll try that soup," he conceded.

CJ re-heated the experiment, and silently dished a bowl. Then sat down to watch her guy eat his words. Chet tasted the soup.

"Wow. It's good!"

"Uh huh. Damn right it is," she smiled.

"So what's the next cooking project?" he laughed.

"Easy there! I just got the soup right." she smiled back at him. Chet remembered the letter.

"Hey, what's this weird letter you received? North Carolina?"

CJ retrieved the note from her desk and handed it to Chet. He read it over.

"Seems reasonable. Not crazy like Elmira. Kids look adorable. When are we going?"

CJ twisted a section of her hair with her fingers. She looked down at the table for a few moments.

"Um, we're not."

Chet put his spoon down. "Huh? If you're worried about me getting time off, I've got a ton of hours open-"

"It's not that," she interrupted "First I'm not sure I want to go. And if we did go together, it would be a problem."

Chet was confused. "What kind of problem? I don't get it."

CJ sighed. "In the letter my aunt said that my grandmother and other aunt had issues with Mom and Daddy because where they're from white men think black women are exotic. And from the tone of it, it seems it's not in a respectful way. If I could pass, then maybe we could travel together-"

Chet held up a hand "Hold it! First I respect you, you should know that. Second, what's this 'pass' stuff?"

"I know you respect me. It's not you. They live in a part of the country where interracial couples aren't accepted-at least I don't think they are yet. If I could pass for white, then we wouldn't be harassed. But I can't, so it would be uncomfortable at best. And as I said, I don't think I even want to go."

Chet sat still. He put his spoon down finally and looked CJ in the eyes.

"I'm speechless."

"Why? It's got nothing to do with you. You're fantastic. They don't know about you yet, and if it were any other part of the country, we'd be there," she responded.

"So what about this "passing" stuff! You don't even want to go on your own. You faced crazy Elmira, but don't want to deal with your mother's heritage."Chet wasn't getting it

CJ's eyes flashed with anger.

"This 'passing' stuff is not a joke! Do you have any idea what it's like to have people ask 'what are you'. What box to check on the Census form? Driver's license application? To get my college scholarship I had to check 'Black' on the application, then almost lose it at the interview when they actually saw me. They thought I was lying! You know what I had to do? Bring my parents' photograph to the admissions office! It's not just annoying, it hurts. I have to constantly pick my battles whether to make a stink or not."

"But this isn't college. It's your relatives asking to see you," Chet insisted.

"I won't fit in with them either," she argued.

"How can you be sure?" he countered

"Because I don't fit in anywhere," she replied."How do I know they're not just curious to see Dianne's daughter-the mixed one. The shoe girl. Her momma ran off with a white guy."

Chet got up from the table, put his bowl in the sink without a word.

He returned to the table, kissed CJ on the top of her head.

"Just a reminder, you're dating a white guy. I think you should consider going, even without me. Though I am a grown man and can handle myself."

"Yes, I know you are, and you can. But I don't want to find ourselves in that situation. And it would be my fault if we did. It's a battle I don't want to pick." She looked up at Chet.

"Because you can't 'pass'?" Chet's question had a touch of disbelief. "Doll I don't get it. Probably never will. But I thought you'd be more mature about this." He headed to the door. "I've got to check on my place and run some errands. I'll give you a call later. Maybe you should call Dr. Westin?" CJ walked Chet to the porch. He kissed her, then hugged her, but it was more of a friend hug, than a passionate one.

CJ sat on the couch, letter in hand. Chet's words felt like a dozen bees went at her heart. Logically he had a point, but emotionally he didn't get it-couldn't get it. She decided to close herself off. She needed to handle this on her own. When Chet called later, CJ didn't answer.


	5. Chapter 5

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 5 - Professor Gage

Last time: CJ and Chet disagreed about her aunt's invitation. CJ went into shut down mode.

The next morning, CJ was transfixed by the television. A brush fire broke in the valley, and already 3 units were on scene, and the command center fully running.

_Good heavens, looks like it's spreading fast. _Her phone began to ring, but CJ didn't want to leave the couch. Then she realized it could be Chet.

CJ barely reached the phone before the answering machine picked up.

"Jenkins Photography," she said breathlessly.

"Hey Sunshine." Steve Stunning was on the other end.

"What's up? You sound serious."

Steve hesitated. "Well it is serious. I just got a call from the Alameda Press. They need a photographer."

"Hey! Finally! What's the story?"

"The Alameda Fire. The one going now. United Press is sending someone also, but Alameda wants some exclusive stuff. If you're in, you gotta tell me now."

She didn't hesitate.

"I'm in. Where do I go?"

Steve gave her instructions. "Fire Department will meet you at that location, then take you and the UP guy to the command center. After that FD will assign you to a crew. Be careful Sunshine."

CJ put on her jeans, hiking boots, lucky tee shirt. She loaded up her father's camera, put extra rolls of film in her work bag. Just before running out the door, she left a message.

"Hi Aunt Mary. I've been assigned the Alameda Fire. Don't worry about me, I'll call when I get back home. Kiss Uncle Mickey for me. Love you both."

"Hi Chet, it's me. Covering Alameda Fire. I'll call when I get back. Don't worry, when it's about pictures, I'm mature."

Chet sat in front of the television.

_She's up there. I can't believe it. Was she thinking?_

"Chet, it's her job." Johnny Gage sat next to Chet on the couch. Chet realized he spoke his thoughts aloud. Neither the squad or the engine company was called to the fire. Command decided some stations had to be held for local emergencies.

"She said when it came to pictures, she was mature," Chet sighed. "I shouldn't have given her a hard time."

"Hard time about what?" Johnny asked.

Chet filled Johnny in about the letter from CJ's aunt and the concerns about not passing for a white person.

"John I don't care if she were polka dot." Chet called Johnny "John" only when he was serious.

"I know you don't Chet, but not everyone is as enlightened as you. I understand what CJ's going through. It's not fun to have people try and fit you into a group. One would think we are all just human beings. What race we are shouldn't matter. Unfortunately CJ has a point."

"She does?" Chet asked eyebrows raised.

"Yes. I understand where you're coming from too. Maybe she was a little immature about how she explained it. However, the issues she described-been there. Not the college part, but the people not believing you're mixed. Insisting that you choose one or the other. Her reluctance to meet her mom's family-I had the same thing with my dad's. They didn't accept my parents either. Never met them."

Chet shook his head, forgetting the fire raging on the television screen.

"Do you regret that?"

Johnny thought for a moment. "Right now, no. They never reached out to me, so it's their loss. As for CJ, she has to do what feels right for her, not necessarily what's logical. If I go to the rez, I get looked at funny-they think I'm more white. Here, I'm a redskin. I almost quit the department when I first started because-well let's just say it wasn't typical hazing. If it weren't for Roy's passion about the medic program, I'd probably be working construction somewhere. Or back on the rez, drinkin'."

Johnny sipped his coffee. Roy walked in and headed to fix himself a cup.

"So you owe Roy one, huh,"Chet said.

Johnny shook his head.

"I owe Roy my life, and he doesn't know the half of it."

Roy sat with his friends. "Doesn't know the half of what?"

"Long story pally. Just giving old Chet here the race lecture. Professor Gage's Mixed Race 101 intro."

Roy thought for a moment, then looked at Chet.

"Maybe Johnny and CJ should have a chat? She'd feel better if she could talk to someone that's going through the same thing."

Chet nodded. "Yeah! I told her she should call Dr. Westin, but maybe-"

"Wait a minute. You told her to call her therapist? No wonder she got upset! She thinks you think she's crazy." Johnny shook his head.

CJ and the United Press photographer arrived at the command center. Engine companies went in and out, grabbing supplies, hustling firefighters in for triage, refilling engine tanks. CJ snapped some shots as they waited for the Chief to assign them. After a few minutes, the coordinator walked up to them. Quick greetings, then the assignments.

"Mr. Martin, you'll be with Engine 127 to your left. You have 5 minutes if you need the latrine. Miss Jenkins, you'll be with Engine 36. You have 10 minutes, since they aren't back from their location yet. Please follow your respective captains instructions, and wear this gear. Good luck." He handed the pair, turnout coats and pink "Press" helmets. Martin took his helmet with a grumble and headed to the latrine. CJ also took advantage and quickly used the facilities. As she emerged, she saw Martin head off, pink helmet bobbing.

"I'd never thought I'd see a Jenkins in a turnout coat again."

CJ turned around to see Captain Terrance Williams grinning at her.

"Hi Uncle Terry," she hugged him, then followed him to the engine. "Let me guess, Uncle Mickey had something to do with this?"

"No, actually I did. Saw your name on the assignment sheet and told Peterson to put you with us. He owed me one."

Williams got serious.

"CJ it's rough out there. You'll get some great action shots, but there's a chance any one of us could get hurt bad. Just do what I say, no crazy shit. If we need an extra pair of hands, we'll tell you. One guy is a boot, Smitty's been around for a while, and Richie Jones is the engineer."

CJ nodded. Jones and Smitty she'd heard about.

"Don't worry. I won't get in the way. Just gotta job to do like you guys."

The group headed to a hillside neighborhood. Fortunately the residents heeded the warning and evacuated. Engine 36 and 54 teamed up to knock back some of the fire threatening the homes at the back of the neighborhood. CJ managed to get the shots she hoped for, but kept one eye on the fire line. As instructed she stayed no more than 10 feet away from the group.

As far as a brush fire went, things were status quo.

Until Smitty tripped on a rock.

Once he was down-Maynard-the boot had to handle a fully charged line on his own. He was losing control.

"Smitty's down!" he yelled. Engine 54's crew couldn't move from their location without risking the fire line. Williams had the other line, Jones had his hands full with the pumps.

Maynard thought he was done for when he felt two hands on his back, steadying him. Then he felt the hose lift a little higher. He risked glancing behind him.

He saw a pink helmet, with a face full of soot grinning back at him.

"Just an extra pair of hands," she called out. "Keep going!"


	6. Chapter 6

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 6 - The Other Side of the Coin

**A/N: Drama galore folks-hold on tight.**

Smitty managed to get back onto his feet. Limping, he tapped CJ on the shoulder and took over. Keeping her promise, she backed off. It wasn't her place and she understood that. The fire appeared beaten back, at least for the present.

"Cap, we're running half full now," Jones called out.

Williams nodded and signaled for the team to fall back. He didn't want to get caught without water. Engine 54 backed down also. Their section was contained as well.

"Let's go! Back to base unless we hear otherwise," he ordered.

CJ hopped into the cab with the captain and Jones. Jones looked at the young photographer and said, "Nice save back there."

She smiled back, "Thanks. Hope I didn't overstep any boundaries."

"No," Captain Williams said. "You were okay. You followed orders. Thanks."

The group made their way back to the command post to have Smitty's foot looked at.

"I'm okay I tell ya, it's just a little twist. I don't want to keep everyone waiting." Smitty grumbled at Craig Brice as he examined his leg.

"There's no reason to risk further injury for the sake of ego," Brice countered.

"Cap? Could you tell this egghead to let me go?" Smitty complained. Brice gave him the death stare.

"Let's see you stand Smith," Brice demanded. Smitty stood up and forced himself to walk as normally as possible. He was a few steps in when the call came out on the radio.

"Engine 36, Truck 17, structure fire, 3761 Pearson Road."

Smitty dashed to the truck, eluding the persnickety paramedic.

"Sorry dude! Gotta run."

"Wait!," Brice called out. It was futile. Williams shrugged his shoulders then followed CJ back into the cab.

The three saw a nasty scene. One house was already going up, two others looked close.

"Stay close to the truck," Williams stared straight ahead. CJ could tell he thought it was bad.

"Yes sir."

"Thank God we refilled," Jones muttered. "We're gonna need it."

The crew, including CJ had switched to their blue jackets. It was too hot for the normal turncoat, and the jackets allowed more movement, which they all needed in order to work the fire. CJ put on her camera gloves, pink fake leather fingerless gloves. They allowed her to hold on to the camera and not lose flexibility.

Williams called over to 17's crew.

"Take the back of the house, we'll take the front and hose what we can!"

"Got it!" 17's captain yelled back.

CJ snapped away. She had just enough time while Smitty got checked to swap out her film and leave it with the coordinator. He would hold the film, and Alameda Press picked it up.

She got one of Jones working the pumps.

Maynard backed Smitty on the line-she got that one.

A shot of the house with a large plume of flame coming through the roof. The house looked as if it were giving up the ghost.

She snapped the two captains working a line together. CJ then stepped back and trained her camera just above the second house. She saw something wicked.

"Cap! Fire on the third house! It's jumped!"

Williams and the other captain looked up. She was right. 17's crew saw it from their vantage and started to train their line on the third house. The captains moved their hose. Smitty and Maynard finished the first house, and with a nod from Jones, joined the battle.

17's crew managed to drive the beast back, but their engineer signaled low water.

"Jonesie! How much we got!" Williams called to his engineer.

"Under half Cap! If it jumps again we're trapped!"

17's captain called out "Back down! We're gonna get stuck, use only to retreat!"

Williams signaled the same.

Smitty and Maynard threw the hose onto the bed and moved for their seats.

CJ came around to jump into the cab...

She felt it.

Something hot and heavy on her shoulder.

She tossed her camera to Williams. "Go Uncle Terry!"

Williams tossed the camera onto the seat and ran to his old friend's daughter.

Maynard beat him to her. He grabbed the burning branch and tossed it. Smitty joined in and slapped the fire off her burning shoulder. 17's captain trained his hose, with a light spray and hit her with it.

"Let's go! It's jumped!"

Both teams scrambled. Jones pulled out with only CJ properly seated. The others jumped on and hung on until they could get seated, 17's crew right behind.

All of their hearts pounded with fear until the nasty fast moving beast was only in the rear view mirror.

Station 51 had a few runs, so it wasn't a total waste holding them in the area. John and Roy had a heart attack patient, so they were at Rampart. While stocking up, Brice and Dwyer brought in a patient. It was the photographer riding with 127. His head was bandaged.

Brice stopped at the desk for supplies also.

"What happened to him?" Johnny asked.

"Doing a ride a long with 127. Took off his helmet to get a photo, got hit with debris. Said he hated pink." Brice shook his head. Then he looked at John and Roy.

"Fellas, I hate to bear rumors, but is Miss Jenkins Chet Kelly's um-"

"Fiance? Yeah." Roy completed the sentence.

"Well, he may need your support,"Brice continued.

Johnny and Roy looked at each other.

"36 and 17 got sent to Pearson Road. According to the copter report, the fire jumped them on 2 sides. They couldn't see if they got out. I hope they're wrong."

Dixie approached from the lounge, looking upset.

"Guys, two teams got caught near Pearson Road. It's on television. They mentioned a photographer, but no names."

"We just heard too Dix. We'd better get to the station." The medics ran out, silent with worry.

When they returned to quarters, the engine crew hadn't returned yet, so there was hope for good news before Chet had to be told anything. Mrs. Cap was there with some snacks, so they filled her in.

"Oh my," was all she could say. Just as they settled down, the engine pulled in. Fortunately Hank Stanley was first in the room. He saw their faces.

"What?"

"The crew CJ was riding with may be trapped," Roy said. "It was on television, someone saw it at the hospital. And Brice told us the copter couldn't confirm if they got out or not."

"I'd better get Chet."

"Too late Cap. I heard." Chet stood at the kitchen door, shaking. Mrs. Cap hugged him, guided him to the couch.

"It's not confirmed Chet, remember that," she soothed.

"This is the other side of the coin, ain't it? This is what you and the other wives go through?"


	7. Chapter 7

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 7 - Other Side of the Coin 2

**Last Time: CJ and the crew barely escaped.**

Two sets of firefighters and one photographer disembarked from their rigs, shaking. Maynard leaned on his side of the engine and vomited, legs trembling.

"Don't get any of your lunch on my rig," Jones teased walking slowly to the canteen, trembling hard himself.

Smitty patted him on the back.

"Welcome to the Fire Department."

Despite his position, Maynard had to laugh.

Another pat.

"Hey guys, thank you." They looked over at CJ, pale under the soot.

"You're welcome," Maynard answered. "You had my back. Was only fair to have yours. Nice catch with the camera. If you hadn't seen the other house-"

Maynard fell silent. He turned pale at the thought of what could have happened.

The two captains approached.

"Maynard, good save. Go get some water on your face and in your system. You too Smitty, and you're going to Rampart for that foot." Williams said.

CJ offered her hand to 17's captain.

"Thank you sir." The words felt inadequate. He took CJ's hand, shook it firmly.

"If you were a guy I'd tell you to sign up," he smiled. "Maynard's right, you were an extra pair of eyes up there. Good luck with the photos." He headed back to his crew, who waved and gave thumbs up to CJ.

Captain Williams hugged his "niece".

"We're stood down. Smitty's too hurt to go back out." At that moment, the press coordinator approached.

"Miss Jenkins, your editor just recalled you. They saw the report and are on fire-pardon pun-to get the photos developed."

CJ shook her head, then paused. "Saw the report?"

"Yes it was on television. We couldn't confirm the team's status so now people are asking for an update. The local station is here. But we've arranged transport to get you back to town. Do you want to say goodbye first? I can buy you a few minutes."

CJ nodded. She hugged her Uncle Terry.

"Be safe."

"We will hon. Get back to your guy." he winked.

She dashed into the canteen and gave quick hugs to the crew. They returned them, and gave her a salute. Then she reported back to the coordinator.

"I'm ready." And she was. She needed to get home now. A part of the wall that was there for years began to break. She wanted clean clothes and a hot bath .She dodged the television crew, only to say "I'm fine."

He pointed to a department vehicle. A slightly older gentleman in a captain's hat waited.

"So, you're the tough cookie riding with 36? I'm surprised they sent a girl. Guess I should call you Brenda Starr." He held the door for CJ.

"Thanks Captain-"CJ waited for the name.

"Robertson, Bob Robertson, Station 10 Ensinol Caynon."

Station 51's crew, including Mrs. Cap(as the men called her) breathed. The fleeting glimpse of CJ dashing past the television camera was enough. She and the crews were alive, though injured. Chet's brow furrowed. Mike noticed.

"What is it?"

"She looked funny."

"Well we only saw her for a second. Maybe she didn't want to talk."

Robertson and CJ drove down to the city center. CJ didn't talk, just stared out the window.

Robertson pulled into a parking lot of a diner.

"You don't look right," he said. "Let's get some food into you before I drop you off. No point you driving home on an empty stomach."

CJ smiled, "Thanks."

They sat in companionable silence, each eating but with their own thoughts. Finally, Robertson spoke.

"You remind me of someone."

"Really?" CJ said with some food tucked in her cheek.

"Yeah, young fellow, dark hair like you. Did a couple shifts with him in Carson City. He was one of those-whaddyacalit-paramedics. Eats the same way."

CJ's eyes grew wide. "Is his name John Gage?"

"Yeah! Yeah, Gage. and his partner was Desoto. Didn't trust them at first. But that was me not liking change," he grinned. "You know them?"

CJ chuckled at that question. "My fiance works with them at 51's."

It was Robertson's turn to stare.

"Really? which one?"

"Kelly, Chet Kelly."

Robertson was silent for a moment.

"Chet Kelly? How many four leaf clovers did he collect to find a gorgeous girl like you? I remember him. Hates conflict. Stood up for Gage and Desoto though. And where's the ring?"

"He's a good guy," CJ said dodging the question.

"How did you meet?" Robertson asked. CJ told him.

He nodded his head at the end of the story. They finished their meal and continued the drive.

CJ again looked out the window and didn't speak.

When they arrived at the newspaper office, it was time for Robertson to say goodbye.

They shook hands, then unexpectedly, Robertson hugged CJ.

"Being that close to the beast is going to shake you for a while kiddo. Now you know what your father went though. Other side of the coin."


	8. Chapter 8

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 8 - Hot Mess

Last time: CJ got a ride from Capt. Robertson, and her wall began to break.

Theodore Small looked up from his desk at the Alameda Press. Before him stood the star photographer. Her face still had soot, her boots were muddy, her hair was singed, and a patch of fabric from her borrowed jacket was burned. But her camera was perfectly protected.

"Cynthia Jenkins," she introduced herself and offered her hand. The other reporters stared at the young woman.

"Theodore Small, city editor." He shook her hand. "Ladies' room is down the hall to the right." CJ nodded her thanks, and headed to the bathroom. Seeing herself in a proper light, CJ realized why Theodore sent her there.

Her hair belonged to Medusa, some of it loose from the pony tail holder, singed. The jacket and her face had dirt on them. She pumped some soap from the dispenser into her hands. Just as CJ was about to lather her face, she looked in the mirror. The soot had darkened her skin.

She didn't see her father in the mirror.

For the first time in her life, Cynthia saw her mother.

The wall cracked some more.

CJ took a breath, then quickly washed her face. Next she rearranged her hair, wincing at the sudden pain in her shoulder. She didn't look in the mirror again, afraid of the side she tended to deny. Satisfied she was half way decent, CJ took another deep breath and headed back to Small's office.

"I know you need to get home, Cynthia so I'll get right to it," Small said. "These photos-couldn't ask for better. And with the television report adding drama, everyone's going to want to see how close you guys were to being trapped."

"And how hard these guys have it. People take them for granted, and that's wrong," CJ replied. Small nodded his head.

"You're right. If you want, we can publish in parts. The fire photos first run, then you can call me tomorrow and let me interview you. We'll run it as a personal interest story with the command center photos."

CJ nodded. "Sounds good. I'll call you first thing." She had the sudden urge to go home. She wanted only a warm bath and bed and a good cry. If she didn't leave then, CJ felt she'd fall apart right at Small's desk. Mercifully, Small shook her hand and said, "Get some sleep."

CJ got her bath. She had to shower lightly first to get the dirt that just wouldn't go away off. Then she set the tub and bubbles. It relieved some of the distress, but not all. Once the water got cold she reluctantly eased herself out and put on her comfy flannels. Her shoulder stung and ached, but she forced herself to ignore it. Pete Roselli brought over dinner, but CJ had no appetite.

She finally checked her answering machine.

"Honey, it's Uncle Mickey and Aunt Mary. We know you're okay, but just wanted to check in. Saw you on tv. Terry got word to us that you guys were alright but you might have hurt your shoulder. Call us when you can."

_I knew they'd be first._

"Cynnnnthia darling! It's Aunt Elmira-I mean Elmira. I just saw the news report. My god! Do you need anything? Please call-I mean, when you can of course. Not being pushy."

_At least she's trying to be respectful, gotta give her credit._

"Cynthia, it's Dr. Westin. I have a slot open tomorrow morning at 10:30. I'll be at my office at Rampart General. You don't have to call back, just come in."

_She's a freaking mind reader._

"Cynthia-I mean CJ. This is Mrs. Stanley, Hank's wife. I was at the station today with the guys and saw the report. We're glad you're okay, but the guys are very worried. I'm sure there's a ton of people calling you, but if you could get in touch with me or them? I can come over if you need anything."

_Wow, Mrs. Cap? How sweet!_

"Hi Thia. Um, I'ma get right to it. I was scared for you. I'm glad you're okay, but you didn't look right on the television. I know I was insensitive the other day-well, I really want to just hold you, doll. Call me."

_Oh god how I want to CB. But I can't, not yet. I need tonight to breathe._

Tears slid down CJ's face. She wanted to call all of them-even Elmira. She wanted Chet to hold her desperately. But she wasn't ready. She needed to regain control of the grief and the pain. She made a list of the people who called and promised herself to contact each one in the morning after seeing Dr. Westin. CJ then changed her mind and made one call right then.

"Los Angeles County Fire Department, Paramedic Roy DeSoto speaking."

"Roy, it's CJ."

"Hey! How are you?" Roy signaled to Johnny that CJ was on the line. Johnny stood by the phone.

"I-I'm not sure. Seeing Dr. Westin tomorrow. Um, Mrs. Cap called. I didn't want you guys to worry or send out a search party."

"You sure you don't need me and Johnny to take a look at you? We're just hanging around."

"No, really, it's-it's- I'm not really hurt-I think." CJ was losing her composure.

Johnny jumped up and down signaling to Roy to give him the phone.

"Hey Johnny just wants to say hi, then we'll let you go. We'll tell Cap you checked in." Roy handed Johnny the phone, whispering "I think she's hurt. See if you can get her to let us go by."

"Hey twin!" Johnny said. "What's shakin'?"

CJ thought for a moment.

"A lot for a while there," she answered.

Johnny caught her tone, and didn't like what he heard.

"Hey Sis, Cap Williams called over and told us what went on. Why don't you let us come by? It's slow here, Roy needs the practice."

CJ laughed. "Okay," she relented "But only if you're really not busy."

Johnny gave Roy the thumbs up. "Be there in five."

Roy called it in, and the squad was off. Just as they began to pull out, the engine crew pulled in.

"Cap, talked to CJ, we're going over there."

"Got it!" Stanley answered. Chet breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe CJ wasn't ready to talk to him, but at least the best paramedics in the county were going to see her.

Roy gently examined CJ's shoulder and dressed her burns. He sighed.

"You've got some burns here for sure. Looks like first degree but you'll need it checked out." Johnny already checked her vitals. He was comfortable with the readings, but didn't like CJ's emotional responses.

"I'm going to be at Rampart tomorrow to see my therapist. I'll stop by the ER afterward," she said.

Johnny looked at his "twin" with concern.

"Well I can't find anything else wrong, physically. But Sis, you just look-well-beaten. We have some time, do you want to talk?"

CJ shook her head.

"Not now, thanks though. But I did meet an old friend of yours today."

The medics looked at each other.

"Does the name Bob Robertson from Station 10 Ensinol Caynon ring a bell?"

"Holy shit! Tall guy, gruff voice?" Johnny asked. Roy's eyes stayed wide.

"Yep, that's him. He drove me to the newspaper office. We stopped at a diner. Said I reminded him of you. Seems we both tuck our food in our cheek when we want to talk." CJ laughed at her two friends' incredulous look.

"Guess we are twins after all," she continued.


	9. Chapter 9

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 9 - Things Fall Apart

Last time: CJ is home, but the wall is about to fall.

After giving the interview she promised, CJ headed to Dr. Westin. She felt distant from her surroundings. The quiet of the hospital in total contrast with the chaos and near death of the day before. She had heard Smitty was sent home with a bad ankle sprain. The first set of photos were published. She noticed a copy of the paper in the waiting area. She listened to others oohing and ahhing over them.

_If you only knew how close you came to not seeing those_, she thought.

"Cynthia? Come in." Dr. Westin greeted her. The doctor took her seat behind the desk, Cynthia the chair in front.

"Well, you've had quite the day or so," the doctor began. "Please tell me about it in your words."

CJ thought for a moment. _How do I tell her I'm falling apart without her suggesting the looney bin?_

"Cynthia?" the doctor leaned forward.

CJ cleared her throat.

"Well the team I was assigned to almost got trapped in a fire. It jumped a fire line and engulfed two homes. I happened to see it jump a third house and we had just enough time to get out..." CJ told the rest of the story.

Dr. Westin listened, took a few notes. Then looked at CJ.

"That was a fairly intense experience. How does it feel to be in a quiet environment now?"

"You read my mind," CJ confessed. "I feel distanced-almost like out of body."

Dr. Westin nodded.

"That is normal. It will stay with you for a while."

"That's what Captain Robertson said," CJ responded.

"Who is Captain Robertson? Tell me about that."

CJ told her about the drive to the newspaper office and the advice the captain gave her. When she mentioned the newspaper office, CJ began to tear up.

"Why are you crying Cynthia," the therapist gently probed.

"I-I don't know."

"Why did you take the assignment?"

"I-I needed to clear my head. My boyfriend and I had a disagreement."

Westin waited for CJ to continue.

"My mother's family contacted me. They want me to come and visit, Chet thinks I should, but I'm not comfortable. They didn't speak to her for years because she married my father. They didn't approve of an interracial relationship. He thought I was immature about it. He doesn't understand. Usually I see my father in the mirror. Yesterday, I saw my mother. It was the soot. It darkened my face." CJ stopped talking and took a tissue from the box.

"Cynthia, do you miss your mother?"

CJ nodded. "But I feel like I hardly knew her."

"Because you had your father with you longer," the doctor guessed.

CJ nodded again. She stifled a sob, took a breath.

"I have to go to the ER now. I've got some burns on my shoulder."

"Cynthia, please don't take this the wrong way. You're a hot mess right now. You need to not take any work for a bit and give yourself a chance to release the grief. I want you to call me tomorrow. We can do a phone session or you can come into the office. And one other thing."

CJ nodded her head.

"Call Chet. Talk to him."

CJ called the other people on her list, then changed her answering machine.

_You have reached Cynthia Jenkins Photography. Please be advised I am on sabbatical for the remainder of the month and not accepting any assignments. You may leave a message at the beep. Thank you._

_Hey, this is Chester B! Leave a message. Peace!_

Chet came home to the most incoherent message anyone ever left on his answering machine.

"Hi, um, it's me, CJ I mean Thia. I-I-I'm sorry. You had a point, and I-well I freaked. It's just-well, I'm-um not ready to handle- I mean I barely can handle-well it's-I-can't leave it on an answering machine. Sighhhhh."

Chet played the message three times. He laughed before returning the call.

"It's Cynthia."

Chet's heart fell. The sadness was so clear.

"Hi Doll. Don't say anything. I'll be there in an hour."

CJ paced. She wanted to make certain she apologized without sounding crazy.

_I got it! I'll rehearse_.

She took a photo of Chet and set it on her easel on the porch. Facing it, CJ took a deep breath.

"Hi-Okay, that sounded lame."

She cleared her throat and tried again.

"What I need to say is I'm sorry. You had a legitimate point. It was logical, and I appreciate you wanting something good for me. I'm just not ready. You see, all this time I've thought of myself as Daddy's girl. I didn't have my mom that long. She told me her family cut her off. They didn't even want photos of me. To hear your grandmother didn't want to see you-that just made me less willing to accept them now. But you're right, they are trying, and I'll give them that.

Something happened to me at the Alameda Fire."

CJ shuddered. Her hands began to shake.

"W-well two things. When we were caught, just before we retreated, a branch fell on my shoulder. The guys jumped in and pulled it off hosed me and we jumped into the rigs and took off. We all realized how close we came to not coming home. It hit me-how- Daddy must have felt when the ceiling fell on him, knowing in that split second he wasn't coming home and no way to tell me goodbye."

CJ's tears flowed. The wall breaking into smaller pieces. The river of grief pushing itself out.

"Then I saw myself in the mirror-" she sobbed harder.

"With the s-s-soot, I looked like Mom. I've never seen her in my reflection before. All this time-she died of an anyuresum. F-Fell out on the front steps. Never-said-goodbye to her either. All this time-people ask me-what I am-I-don't know. I -I just miss my mom and dad. T-Thought I c-could deal but-"

With an incoherent wail, CJ collapsed to the deck, grief that had been held back for years forced its way out.

She didn't sense the arms that caught her, scooped her up and carried her to the couch.

Chester Kelly wrapped his arms around the woman he loved, kissed her hair, and held her until she passed out from crying.


	10. Chapter 10

Passing

by Rosalind B

Chapter 10 - Einstein & Medusa

Last time: CJ finally let her guard down and grief out.

_Where am I?_

CJ's eyes half opened. It took a few moments to register that she was in bed, tucked under her comforter. She stretched, yawned then curled back around her pillow. After a while, she got up and freshened up in the bathroom. Then she heard someone in the kitchen.

_That's right, Chet was coming over. Oh my god, he must've found me on the deck. Hope he's not freaking out._

She trotted into the kitchen to find her guy reheating the pasta Pete Roselli brought over. Chet set the table, and had just removed the warmed food from the oven. He looked up from the table. Neither spoke. CJ walked over to Chet and wrapped her arms around him. She could feel his heartbeat through his apron. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. She looked up into his face, then traced his cheek with her hand. He took it, kissing her palm. CJ lay her head back onto his chest. After a few more silent moments, her stomach growled, breaking it. They laughed.

CJ felt lighter emotionally, but physically exhausted. She and Chet ate in companionable silence. Chet decided to let things be.

_She looks better. I'm not going to say anything yet. Probably doesn't remember me showing up._

CJ leaned back in her chair, burped her approval, and giggled with a blush.

"Hey, I must've looked a hot mess laying on the deck. Didn't mean to scare you. I was um, rehearsing what I wanted to say to you."

Chet took the plunge.

"I know doll."

CJ's eyes widened, but she didn't respond.

"I was standing behind you. You never hit the deck. I caught you."

CJ turned red. "How much did you hear?"

"I think about all of it. When I showed up you were saying I had a point about visiting you mother's family."

She nodded, "Yeah that was almost the beginning. I've never broken down like that before."

Chet gathered her dish. "It looked like it was a long time coming." He put the dishes in the sink and began to wash them. CJ stood up, hopped over to her guy and gently turned him away from the sink. She kissed him, lightly at first, then more insistent. He responded, sensing she missed him as much as he missed her.

They pulled themselves apart to catch their breaths.

"Bedroom," they said in unison. Laughing, the couple retreated to their sanctuary.

_Bzzzzzzz..._

Chet stretched over his sleeping girlfriend and shut off the alarm. He let his arm drape across her as he watched her face. She looked a lot younger, less stressed than when she usually slept.

_Guess the grief affected her sleep too, he thought. She looks so much better._

He played with her hair, gently, attempting not to awaken her. Chet heard a mumble. He leaned over to try and catch what CJ was saying in her sleep.

"It's five-thirty." She opened one eye, then the other, then winked at Chet. She rolled over, kissed him then went from kiss to more very quickly and passionately.

6:30

CJ drifted back to sleep. Chet, now happily awake slipped out of bed to take care of business. He snuggled back into bed, sliding his arm over CJ. Even though he thought he was awake, Chet found himself drifting off again. Luckily he didn't have a shift.

7:30

It was CJ's turn to slip out of bed. She was fully awake and aware of what went on. She took a brief shower, put on a new flannel shirt and returned to the bedroom. She sat in front of the mirror to begin assessing her partially singed hair. Even wet, it looked unruly. As she brushed it, Chet's reflection caught her eye. CJ let out a giggle.

"Oh my lord," she laughed.

"Whasamatta Thia?" Chet muttered. "Come backtabed."

CJ shook her head, laughing. Chet, now more awake sat up. This made her laugh harder.

"Hee hee hee, oh gosh."

"Okay, what is it?" Chet was glad to hear her laughter.

"You-you look like Einstein. Your hair-hee hee hee." Chet finally caught his reflection. His hair was in almost "afro mode". He totally resembled the famous scientist.

Chet hopped out of bed and sat next to CJ on the dressing bench. He wiggled his mustache, then his eyebrows, making CJ laugh more. Finally he said,

"Well missy, you're in total 'Medusa' mode."

CJ shook her hair so it almost stood up. She did resemble the mythological character. The two studied their reflections and laughed some more.

"Oh my," CJ finally calmed down. She ran her hand through Chet's "bed head".

"Chester B. Kelly, what am I to do with you?"

"I have an idea, doll." He leaned over and whispered his idea in her ear.

"Hmmm...sounds like a plan. Could we have breakfast first? I'll make pancakes."


	11. Chapter 11

Passing

by Rosalind B

_Chapter 11 - Sounds Like A Plan_

_Last time: They made love and pancakes_.

After checking in with Dr. Westin as promised, CJ and Chet took care of the first part of the plan. They went to Picard's Natural Palace and got hair cuts. CJ also treated herself to a facial, and Chet to a gentleman's shave.

"Only trim the lip fur, don't even think of taking it off!" she ordered. "It's the sexiest part."

The entire salon cracked up laughing. Chet went red cheeked, but his ego was a little stoked too. The staff kept them apart until they were both finished as a surprise.

Finally...

"Whoa!" Chet reached out and gently stroked CJ's new do. "Nice and soft. It's a little short, but I'm diggin' it."

CJ caressed Chet's now stubble free face.

"Oooh, smoooth..I likey." She inspected his now almost regulation length cut.

"May I?" she ran her fingers through it before he could respond. "Wow! You're hair's soft too. I can really see your ears now." She snuck a kiss on his neck. "They did a great job."

"Same for you doll. We need to do this on a regular schedule."

"Definitely! Once a month, we pamper ourselves. I'm starting to feel centered again." They made their way out and back to CJ's jeep.

"Well, since I'm on sabbatical, and you're not, I'll handle the next part of the plan," she said.

"Perfect," Chet agreed. He stroked her arm while she drove.

"How about the park? Or is that too ordinary?" She started brainstorming.

"Eh..that is kinda ordinary. But we should have it outdoors," he said.

"Well, I'll start calling people with the date at least," she replied. "When will the whole gang be off at once? People may need a day to recuperate after," CJ laughed.

"I think in two weeks we're off Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. So Sunday seems best. I'll check with Cap'n Stanley."

Back at her place, Chet picked up his van and headed back to his apartment. Of course a make out session came first.

"You know doll, we really need to think about getting a place together."

CJ blushed. "You read my mind. The studio is perfect for me, but not for two people. And your place is kinda well, city-ish. I like a garden. But let's get the plan out of the way first."

Chet whistled while he and Marco hung the hoses.

"So, what's this get together all about?" Marco called down to his friend.

"Yeah, what's up?" Mike joined them and started setting up the hoses. "The haircut's throwing us off as it is," he joked.

"What? You're not digging my soft shiny do?" Chet did the fake hair model shake.

"Considering Cap nearly passed out when he saw you at roll call, it's gotta be a special occassion," Roy chimed in.

"Well, things have been so serious lately, CJ 'n me decided it was time to have some fun with our nearest and dearest."

"Is it something you called your sister for?" Marco knew CJ wasn't the only one with estranged family.

Chet took a breath, "No, not yet. But CJ's going to write her mother's sister, so I promised to contact my younger sister and brother. The older ones can go fish." They guys laughed and worked.

Johnny bounded out of the bay catching the last sentence.

"Go fish about what? What did I miss?"

"CJ's not the only one with crazy family," Mike offered. "We're trying to find out how special this occasion is."

"Where's it gonna be Chet?" John asked.

"That's the thing, we can't think of a cool outdoors place. The park is passe."

"Why not come up to the ranch? My friend Joey is away that weekend, so I was going to go there and horse-sit anyway. He's got two grills and the place is big enough for kids to run around."

"Really Johnny? That would be awesome! I'd better call Thia-"

"Easy there! You'll fall man! I'll call her," Johnny offered.

"This is Cynthia."

"Hey twin!"

"Hi Johnny! What's up?" CJ smiled. Even Johnny's voice was hyper.

"Heard you guys need an outdoor spot for your party. My friend's ranch is available. It's not too far from here, and there's plenty of space. Maybe you and I can have a horse ride before it starts. I'd love to have a brother-sister chat."

"Oh Johnny, if I were there I'd hug you! That would be perfect. Thank you!"

Johnny kept his word, and CJ arrived early for their "brother-sister" ride. Johnny picked an older, gentler mare for CJ, since she'd never ridden before. He led them along a shady path. The only sounds were the horse's hooves, the wind in the trees and the songbirds dotting the way. CJ's spirit calmed down several paces. She felt a kinship with her gentle horse and the young man leading the way. Eventually they reached a clearing near a stream. Johnny helped CJ dismount. They let the horsed drink, tied them to a nearby tree, then made their way closer to the water. CJ brought sandwiches and water in canteens. The other guests weren't due for a few hours.

"So twin. It's been a rough couple of months huh?"

CJ sighed,"Yeah it's been bumpy. But I think things are finally settling down."

Johnny contemplated the water.

"I know it's hard, not knowing. Not sure what you are. Worrying about what other people think. I'm there too. Didn't get to say goodbye to my parents either."

CJ played with a smooth stone.

"A few weeks ago I didn't know if I was coming or going. There are supposed to be several stages of grief. I tried to skip them all." She looked out to the hill.

"Part of it was I just couldn't deal. I had to survive first. Then the abuse had to be dealt with. Once that got handled, back to surviving. School, college, career. I just never sat down and felt it. I cried all right. Cried a lot. Then jumped right back into life."

Johnny flicked a pebble into the stream, listening.

"Dr. Westin tried to get me to feel it. Said it would catch up to me one way or the other. Either it's let out or it eats you up, she said. If it weren't for the fire assignment, it would have eaten me up. What really hurts-it affected Chet too. He was so worried about me, he wasn't taking care of himself either. That's why I didn't speak to him until after. And of course I go and have a meltdown in front of him." She shook her head.

Johnny contemplated.

"Well, Chet's a big boy. He can handle himself. Yeah, he was worried. And he didn't understand the whole passing for white thing. Had to school him on that. When I first joined the department, the hazing was at a totally different level. It wasn't hazing, it was abuse. No coverage on a ladder, too much pressure on hoses, with no backup. Someone put a rubber tomahawk in my locker one day. Next day a headdress. Day after that, a teepee ripped to shreds. The captain finally figured it out when he found the wig."

CJ shuddered at what that meant.

"Wig? As in scalping someone?"

Johnny sighed. "Yep. Some idiot took a wig, tied it into a ponytail and wrote on a sheet of paper 'how many scalps do you have at home redskin'. Thing was, they put it in the captain's locker by mistake. He confronted me. I told him about the other stuff and he couldn't believe I put up with it that long. What else could I do? It stopped after that, but I knew that station was not the place for me."

"What about on the rez?"she asked.

"There, I just got beat up. People thought I had airs because I was a fireman. Eventually I just stayed away."

CJ wanted to cry. "You have to avoid your home? That's that's just-wicked."

"Wicked indeed. I have an aunt there, I do still see her. Those visits are during the daytime. Being on the rez at night is not a good idea for someone like me."

CJ silently counted her blessings. As bad as things were in her life, she at least had something of a home with the McConike's. She had one other question.

"If you didn't join up with the paramedics, would you still be a fireman?"

Johnny didn't hesitate.

"No. Meeting Roy DeSoto, that saved not just my career, but my life. I questioned the heck out of him the day we met. But he was so passionate that we could make a difference. And he didn't care what I was-even though I didn't know. As I told Chet, I'd be working construction, or an alcoholic getting into fights on the rez."

It was now Johnny's turn to ask CJ his question.

"Can you forgive?"

"Forgive? Who?" CJ was confused

"Your mother's family for rejecting you. Crazy Elmira. Your parents for leaving you too soon. I know they died, but I used to get angry at mine. It made no sense but-"

"It makes sense," CJ sighed. "You hit the nail on the head. I blamed them for a while too. Elmira, yes, I forgave her. Don't quite mesh with her style-she's highfalutin' " they both laughed.

"And your mom's family?"

"I don't know. I think I can, but I need time. Chet and I promised to reach out to our respective families-his older brother and sister and he don't get along. But he's going to write his younger sister. I'm not ready to visit mine though."

Johnny was curious, "What's up with the Phantom's family?"

"Not sure. I think since he was the middle child, he got ignored a lot. The older siblings couldn't be bothered, the younger ones got attention from his parents. He came to California to make a name for himself. Don't tell him, but I think he hurts just as much as I do-more probably because he has family and doesn't talk to them. It's lonelier that way I think. Maybe that's why he has the comic book collection."

Johnny raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything.

CJ continued, "Superheroes are more reliable than people I suppose. He jokes a lot, but it's not easy for him to make friends. At one of my art events, I overheard him say he couldn't believe a woman like me would love a chubby average guy like him. Chet's quite shy."

Johnny nodded, making a mental note to let Chet bug him more often.

"We'd better make our way back," he looked at his watch. "Or they'll send out a search party."

The party was in full swing. Marco and the Roselli brothers compared recipes. Dixie, Joe Early, Kel Brackett and Mike Morton raved over the ranch and the horses. Roy's children swung on the old tires, then tried out the kites Chet bought for them, superhero themed.

Hank Stanley and Mrs. Cap raved over Marco's ribs and corn on the cob. Mrs. McConnike

and Mrs. Roselli sat on the porch enjoying the view and the food.

Chet quietly approached the Chief and whispered something in his ear. Paul McConnike gestured to his wife, and they walked to the porch.

"Um, Chief, Mrs. Chief-I mean Mrs. McConnike. Um I wanted to ask you both first." Chet shook in his shoes.

"Go on ragazzo(boy)," said Mrs. Roselli grinning.

"Yes, please," smiled Mary McConnike.

" Well, you all know I love your niece very much. I still can't believe she loves me. There's a ring burning in my pocket. With your permission, I'd like to ask her to marry me. She doesn't know I'm going to ask. She thinks this is just a party."

The Chief slapped Chet on the shoulder. "Welcome to the family. Now go ask her."

CJ was chatting with Mike when Chet tapped her on the shoulder. Too nervous to speak, he guided her to the porch. CJ started to wonder what happened. The chief whispered something to Hank, Hank pulled the guys aside and whispered to them, Mrs. Roselli began to cry.

CJ was confused, but not for long. Chet knelt down.

"I still can't believe you love an average guy like me. You're smart, funny, strong-and I could go on. But this ring's burning a hole in my pocket." He pulled out a simple solitaire diamond ring and slipped it on her finger.

CJ couldn't speak. She smiled, tears running down her face. The wives in attendance cried. Marco's sister cried.

"I take it that smile is a 'yes'?" he asked.

"Yep." She pulled him to his feet and kissed him.

_Dear Aunt Rasheda,_

_I'm sorry it's taken so long to write back. I had an assignment and was injured. I'm better now though. Thank you so much for the photo and the note. The children are very beautiful. While I appreciate you and Aunt Ramona wanting to make things right, I'm not ready for a visit yet. I will call in a week or so and we can talk some more._

_Since you were kind enough to send a photo, we wanted to send one of us. _

_Yes, "we". I just got engaged to a wonderful guy last weekend. Maybe, if things work out, you can come to California for the wedding._

_Fondly,_

_Cynthia_


End file.
